Things Koreans Say (Volume 2 – more classic lesson quotes from the past year!)

When I was in Italy, I slept with 19 men” (Context: Italian dorm owners can’t tell the difference between male and female Korean names, stick female student in male dorm. But that took some explaining at the time!)

“If I was a millionaire, I would buy a pissing pot” (great mispronunciation of fishing boat)

“I cook myself often” (ouch!)

“Calum, do you sandwich?” (erm, what would that involve exactly?)

“I don’t wear underwear” (confused with undershirt, or so he says)

“If we made a ship out of Titanium, we would be Somalia” (you what?)

(After discovering driving lessons might be expensive in Australia…) “Maybe I can meet a man to ride me”

“To keep healthy, we should drink a bottle of Soju and smoke half a pack a day” (the ‘salary man’ diet)

“When meeting Korean persons for the first time, we should be careful to wear clothes” (good advice there)

“If I see a snake, I want to eat it, so it will be strenuous” (never had that desire myself, but ok…)

“So you can come over at midnight, I’ll prepare a midnight meal and a contract” (sounds fun!)

“Can I breed my cats in your apartment” (great image for the landlord there!)

“She is doing herself” (indeed – not image prompted in anyway!)

“Mr Lee wants to import the American beef problem, but the people don’t want it”

“You need to filter the dog from the Soju” (oddly, not a mistake, this is part of an old recipe to make an ancient stamina drink. Don’t want to try that one myself!)

“If I’m in New York, what’s the best way to get down?”

“I can feel you’re hard” (or ‘it’s difficult’ as we say English)

“It is most important to pay attention to your member” (yes, yes it is)

“Do you have a bog moolah in your pocket?” (erm… not sure what you’re getting at there!)

“Would you like to be turned on?” (I wish I knew the context to that!)

“I think the beef protests might be a crap” (trap!)

“If you don’t feel like answer you can give lip service” (I guess that could work)

“Julia, do you have a beaver” (10 year old girl!)

“Yeah, bit it can be used for porn” (student explains her PC can also be used as a PHONE)

“I went to St Davids” “Did you play with Bush?” (Wrong, so wrong!)